Taking Humans Out Of The Loop

A good summary of what probably is our future. All that has to happen is for things to stay the same and we don’t change direction.

Who Is Guarding Ireland?

Whoever it is needs to stop.

6 Friendship, Dating, and Marriage

How Of Dating Part 2

Questions Asked in the Lesson

 How does one recover from a broken relationship?
 How is one to respond when one’s sweetheart is drifting away?
 How to solve conflict?
 How to let a guy know you are interested without appearing forward?
 How to be an attractive individual?
 How not to arouse the fire of passion?
 How to grow spiritually on your dates?
 How to interpret body language?
 How to overcome shyness?
 How to have a worthwhile time yet not be financially exploited?
 How to get hurt?

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Summary

The lesson discusses the “how” of dating, focusing on Biblical principles and practical advice for navigating romantic relationships. It covers a range of topics including breaking off a relationship, recovering from rejection, handling conflicts, interpreting body language, overcoming shyness, and avoiding financial exploitation during dates. The teacher emphasizes speaking the truth in love, seeking godly counsel, and trusting God’s plan throughout these processes. Additionally, the lesson highlights the importance of spiritual growth within relationships, understanding non-verbal communication, and avoiding emotional or physical manipulation. Ultimately, it encourages listeners to prioritize their relationship with Christ above all else.

Test Your Knowledge

Scrolling down slowly will hide the answer until you can make your choice.

1.What is one of the key aspects emphasized in the lesson regarding dating?

a) Finding the perfect person
b) Entering a relationship as quickly as possible
c) Understanding oneself before dating
d) Avoiding relationships altogether

Answer: c)

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2.Why are boundaries important in dating?

a) They make relationships more exciting
b) They prevent unnecessary heartache and confusion
c) They ensure complete control over the other person
d) They are only necessary in marriage

Answer: b)

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3.What is the purpose of dating, according to the lesson?

a) To casually spend time with others
b) To develop character and discern long-term compatibility
c) To always lead directly to marriage
d) To avoid being single

Answer: b)

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4.How does community help in the dating process?

a) By controlling dating choices
b) By providing wisdom, advice, and accountability
c) By setting up relationships for people
d) By discouraging dating altogether

Answer: b)

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5.What is a key component of effective communication in relationships?

a) Avoiding difficult conversations
b) Assuming the other person understands without speaking
c) Clearly expressing expectations and resolving conflicts
d) Letting emotions dictate all interactions

Answer: c)

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6.According to the lesson, which verse encourages believers to speak the truth in love?

a) Proverbs 16:21
b) Ephesians 4:15
c) Colossians 4:6
d) Philippians 2:3-4

Answer: b)

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7.What should someone do before breaking off a relationship, according to the lesson?

a) Ignore the other person completely
b) Consult godly counselors
c) Rebound quickly
d) Make threats to gain control

Answer: b)

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8.Which of the following is NOT listed as a way to grow spiritually on dates?

a) Memorizing Bible verses
b) Watching movies together
c) Praying together
d) Sharing faith with others

Answer: b)

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9.What does the lesson suggest about overcoming shyness?

a) It cannot be overcome
b) It requires planning ahead and analyzing situations
c) It only happens through dating
d) It is caused by genetics

Answer: b)

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10.What type of individual is described as seeing another person as a “movie screen” upon which they project their ideal partner?

a) Physical conquest
b) Psychological conquest
c) Projected image
d) Emotional manipulator

Answer: c)

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Outline

I.Introduction
A.Overview of dating principles
B.Importance of wisdom in relationships
II.Knowing Yourself
A.Understanding personal values and priorities
B.Self-awareness as a foundation for healthy dating
III.Setting Boundaries
A.Importance of emotional and physical boundaries
B.How boundaries foster respect and clarity
IV.Purpose of Dating
A.Dating with intentionality
B.Differentiating casual dating from serious relationships
V.Emotional and Spiritual Maturity
A.Developing character before entering a relationship
B.The role of faith and personal growth
VI.Community and Accountability
A.The importance of seeking advice and wisdom
B.The role of mentors and trusted friends
VII.Communication in Relationships
A.Effective communication strategies
B.Understanding expectations and conflict resolution
VIII.Conclusion
A.Encouragement to pursue healthy relationships
B.Final thoughts on dating with wisdom and intentionality

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Outline 2

I.How to Break Off a Relationship:
A.Be Biblical (Ephesians 4:15, Proverbs 16:21, Colossians 4:6).
B.Think beforehand and consult godly counselors (Proverbs 15:28, 18:19).
C.Recognize shared responsibility and discern emotional involvement.
D.Have a thoughtful conference to communicate the breakup.
II.Recovering from a Broken Relationship:
A.Allow grief but avoid bitterness (James 1:20, Ephesians 4:26-27).
B.Seek God’s comfort and support from others (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
C.Trust God’s sovereignty and purpose in pain (Romans 8:28).
III.Responding When a Sweetheart Drifts Away:
A.Avoid control; reevaluate personal behavior and the other person’s intentions.
B.Call for a respectful conversation if needed.
IV.Solving Conflicts:
A.Assume misunderstandings first; seek resolution through compromise.
V.Letting Someone Know You’re Interested Without Being Forward:
A.Invite them to group activities; be friendly but genuine.
VI.Being Attractive and Avoiding Arousing Passion:
A.Be gracious, friendly, and spiritually minded; dress modestly.
VII.Growing Spiritually on Dates:
A.Engage in Bible study, prayer, and fellowship together.
VIII.Interpreting Body Language:
A.Understand non-verbal cues and respond appropriately.
IX.Overcoming Shyness:
A.Analyze triggers, plan ahead, and don’t expect rejection.
X.Having Fun Without Financial Exploitation:
A.Choose affordable, creative date ideas.
XI.Conclusion: Avoid becoming victims of counterfeit loves and focus on Christ.

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The Lesson

INSERTAUDIO

Here is a list of questions that will be answered:

1. What Biblical principles does the teacher suggest for breaking off a relationship, and why are they important?

2. How can someone recover from a broken relationship without falling into bitterness, according to the lesson?

3. In what ways can Christians grow spiritually while dating, and why is this significant?

4. Why is it crucial to interpret body language accurately in relationships, and what examples does the lesson provide?

5. What advice does the teacher give for overcoming shyness, and how might this apply beyond dating?

6. Why is self-awareness important before entering a dating relationship?

7. According to this lesson, How do boundaries contribute to a healthy dating experience?

8. According to this lesson, what role does spiritual and emotional maturity play in relationships?

9. According to this lesson, why is community and accountability valuable in dating?

10. According to this lesson, how does effective communication impact the success of a relationship?

Study Guide

1. What Biblical principles does the teacher suggest for breaking off a relationship, and why are they important?

The teacher suggests several Biblical principles for breaking off a relationship, emphasizing their importance in ensuring the process is handled with wisdom, grace, and respect. First, the lesson references Ephesians 4:15, which encourages believers to “speak the truth in love.” This principle ensures that honesty is balanced with compassion, minimizing unnecessary hurt. Second, it cites Proverbs 16:21 and Colossians 4:6, which highlight the value of gracious and thoughtful communication—using words that are “full of grace, seasoned with salt” to convey difficult truths without causing further harm. Additionally, Proverbs 15:28 advises thinking before speaking, and Proverbs 18:19 warns against careless actions that could lead to irreversible damage. These principles are important because they guide individuals to approach breakups with integrity and care, avoiding bitterness or unresolved conflict, while also reflecting Christ-like character in challenging situations.

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2. How can someone recover from a broken relationship without falling into bitterness, according to the lesson?

According to the lesson, recovering from a broken relationship without falling into bitterness involves several key steps:

1.Allow Yourself to Grieve : It’s important to acknowledge and accept the hurt rather than repressing it. The lesson emphasizes that mourning is natural and even blessed, as Jesus said, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). Grieving is necessary, but it should not turn into bitterness.
2.Avoid Letting Hurt Turn into Anger or Bitterness : The lesson warns against letting unresolved anger or bitterness take root. Passages like James 1:20 (“The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God”) and Ephesians 4:26-27 (not letting the sun go down on your anger, so as not to give the devil a foothold) highlight the importance of addressing emotional pain in a healthy way.
3.Seek God’s Comfort and Support from Others : The lesson encourages seeking comfort from God, who is described as the “Father of mercies and God of all comfort” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4). Additionally, it suggests allowing godly friends or family to comfort you, as Romans 12:15 says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.” This helps prevent self-pity while providing emotional support.
4.Trust God’s Sovereignty and Purpose : The lesson stresses trusting that God can bring good out of painful situations, referencing Romans 8:28 (“All things work together for good to those who love God”). Even if someone intended harm by breaking off the relationship, God can use it for your spiritual growth, much like Joseph’s story in Genesis 50:20 (“What you meant for evil, God meant for good”).
5.Forgive the Other Person : Forgiveness is crucial, as emphasized in Ephesians 4:31-32, which instructs believers to put away bitterness, wrath, and anger, and instead be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving. Forgiveness prevents bitterness from taking root and reflects Christ’s forgiveness toward us.
6.Be Open to Comforting Others : The lesson mentions that God comforts us so that we, in turn, can comfort others. By becoming a conduit of God’s comfort, you can find purpose and meaning even in your pain.
7.Avoid Rebound Relationships : The lesson warns against rushing into another relationship to cope with the pain, as this can lead to vulnerability and poor decisions, especially regarding sexual boundaries.

By following these principles—grieving healthily, seeking comfort from God and others, forgiving, trusting God’s plan, and avoiding rebound relationships—you can recover from a broken relationship without succumbing to bitterness.

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3. In what ways can Christians grow spiritually while dating, and why is this significant?

According to the lesson, Christians can grow spiritually while dating through several specific activities that foster spiritual development and deeper fellowship with God. These methods include:

1.Bible Study : Couples can select a subject of mutual interest (such as the Holy Spirit, temptation, or knowing God’s will) and conduct independent research, then share their findings on subsequent dates. Alternatively, they can study a Bible study book or a book of the Bible together over successive dates.
2.Scripture Memorization : The lesson humorously suggests that couples agree to memorize two Bible verses each as a prerequisite for going out on a date. This encourages both partners to engage deeply with Scripture and hold each other accountable.
3.Prayer : Spiritual growth can be nurtured by beginning and ending dates with prayer, praying over meals together, attending prayer meetings together, and practicing conversational prayer. However, the teacher warns against allowing spirituality to become a trigger for physical attraction, advising caution in this area.
4.Witnessing : Couples can volunteer to take evangelism classes together, distribute Christian literature, visit friends to discuss faith, or participate in organized witnessing events through their church. Agreeing to share their faith with a certain number of people before the next date is suggested as a way to keep each other accountable.
5.Fellowship : Engaging in small group Bible studies where they can share and fellowship with other believers is encouraged. Additionally, taking time to verbally praise God together for His blessings and who He is can enhance spiritual intimacy.

Significance of Spiritual Growth While Dating

The significance of growing spiritually while dating lies in preparing for a future marriage that remains centered on Christ. The lesson emphasizes that if couples cannot engage in spiritual activities like Bible study, prayer, and witnessing during the dating phase, it will be even more challenging to incorporate these practices after marriage. By prioritizing spiritual growth early on, couples lay a foundation for a Christ-centered relationship, ensuring that their attraction to each other also draws them closer to God.

As Ed McCauley, a missionary who was later martyred, expressed about his own relationship: “As long as we’ve got anything to do with each other, that each of us will be an influence upon the other for closer fellowship with the Lord.” This perspective underscores the idea that romantic attraction should serve as a means of deepening one’s relationship with God, not detracting from it. Ultimately, the goal is to ensure that both partners are becoming the “right kind of person” and not merely seeking the “right person,” thereby building a relationship that reflects Christ’s love and wisdom.

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4. Why is it crucial to interpret body language accurately in relationships, and what examples does the lesson provide?

According to the lesson, interpreting body language accurately in relationships is crucial because non-verbal communication often conveys more than words and plays a vital role in understanding the other person’s feelings, intentions, and level of interest. Misinterpreting body language can lead to confusion, unnecessary hurt, or missed opportunities for connection. For instance, someone might mistake another person’s shyness or attempt to avoid appearing too forward as disinterest, which could prematurely end a potential relationship. Similarly, misreading signs of discomfort or rejection can result in inappropriate behavior or persistence that makes the other person feel uneasy.

Examples from the Lesson:

1.Folded Arms and Serious Look : If a date sits with folded arms and a serious expression, this could indicate they are rejecting what you are saying.
2.Leaning Back with Arms Behind Head : If your date leans back in their chair, puts their arms behind their head while you’re talking, it might suggest they feel important or superior.
3.Crossed Legs and Leaning Forward : If your date crosses their legs, leans forward with both hands resting on their knees, and smiles, this could mean they are interested in what you are saying.
4.Grooming Gestures : If your date arranges their hair, straightens their tie, or glances in a mirror before you arrive, it might signal they are interested in you. However, if they do these things after you’ve started talking and seem indifferent, it could mean they are uninterested.
5.Relaxed Posture : A girl who sits with one leg tucked under her and slips off one shoe, balancing it on her toe, might be very relaxed around you.
6.Flirting Signals : If a date tilts their head, places a hand on their hip, and shows their wrist or palm while glancing at you, it may indicate flirting.
7.Touch : If your date touches you, it could mean they are reassuring you, seeking reassurance, or asserting ownership (e.g., a girl putting her arm through her date’s to signal “ownership”). Conversely, if they don’t want to be touched, it might indicate unresolved conflict or discomfort.

The lesson emphasizes that body language should not be interpreted dogmatically but used as a tool to understand the other person better. Accurate interpretation fosters healthier communication and helps avoid misunderstandings that could harm the relationship.

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5. What advice does the teacher give for overcoming shyness, and how might this apply beyond dating?

The teacher provides several practical suggestions for overcoming shyness, emphasizing that it is not an incurable condition but rather a challenge that can be addressed with intentional effort. Here’s the advice given:

1.Recognize That Shyness Is Not Permanent : The teacher reassures listeners that shyness is not an inherent or unchangeable trait. Everyone experiences shyness to some degree, and most people grow out of it over time. Understanding this truth helps individuals avoid feeling trapped by their insecurities.
2.Analyze Triggers : The teacher encourages individuals to identify specific situations, environments, or types of people that trigger their shyness. By replaying these scenarios in their minds and role-playing them if necessary, individuals can gain insight into their behavior and seek wisdom from God on how to improve (referencing James 1:5).
3.Plan Ahead : To reduce anxiety in social settings, the teacher suggests preparing topics of conversation in advance. Thinking of 10 general subjects that most people enjoy discussing allows shy individuals to feel more confident and less caught off guard during interactions.
4.Avoid Expecting Rejection : Many shy people assume they will be rejected before even engaging with others. The teacher advises against this mindset, reminding listeners that everyone needs encouragement and acceptance—including those who may seem confident. Recognizing mutual vulnerability can motivate shy individuals to take initiative instead of withdrawing.

Application Beyond Dating

This advice applies broadly to various areas of life beyond dating, such as friendships, professional relationships, and community involvement:

 Friendships : Overcoming shyness through self-awareness and preparation enables individuals to build deeper connections with peers. For example, planning thoughtful questions or topics for group discussions can make social gatherings less intimidating.
 Professional Settings : In workplaces or networking events, analyzing triggers and rehearsing potential conversations can boost confidence when meeting new colleagues or presenting ideas. Planning ahead ensures readiness for interviews, meetings, or public speaking engagements.
 Community Engagement : Participating in church groups, volunteer organizations, or neighborhood activities requires interaction with diverse individuals. By focusing on shared human needs and avoiding assumptions of rejection, shy individuals can contribute meaningfully and form supportive relationships.

Ultimately, the principles of overcoming shyness—such as self-reflection, proactive planning, and empathy toward others—are universally applicable. They foster personal growth, enhance communication skills, and promote healthier relationships across all aspects of life.

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6. Why is self-awareness important before entering a dating relationship?

According to the lesson, self-awareness is important before entering a dating relationship because it helps individuals understand their own values, priorities, and personal growth. By knowing oneself, a person can make wiser dating choices, set appropriate boundaries, and avoid unhealthy relationships. Self-awareness also allows individuals to recognize what they need in a partner and ensures that they enter relationships with clarity and intentionality rather than out of insecurity or pressure.

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7. According to this lesson, How do boundaries contribute to a healthy dating experience?

According to the lesson, boundaries contribute to a healthy dating experience by fostering respect, clarity, and emotional well-being. They help individuals maintain their values and avoid compromising situations that could lead to confusion or heartache. Boundaries also establish clear expectations in the relationship, promoting mutual understanding and preventing misunderstandings. By setting emotional and physical limits, couples can build a foundation of trust and self-control, ensuring that their relationship develops in a healthy and intentional manner.

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8. According to this lesson, what role does spiritual and emotional maturity play in relationships?

According to the lesson, spiritual and emotional maturity play a crucial role in relationships by providing a strong foundation for wise decision-making, healthy communication, and personal growth. Emotional maturity helps individuals handle conflicts constructively, manage their feelings, and approach relationships with patience and understanding. Spiritual maturity ensures that one’s values and faith guide the relationship, promoting integrity and a long-term perspective. Together, these qualities help individuals build stable, respectful, and meaningful connections that align with their personal and spiritual goals.

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9. According to this lesson, why is community and accountability valuable in dating?

According to the lesson, community and accountability are valuable in dating because they provide wisdom, guidance, and support throughout the relationship process. Seeking counsel from trusted friends, mentors, or family members helps individuals make informed decisions and avoid potential pitfalls. Accountability also encourages honesty and integrity, helping couples maintain healthy boundaries and stay aligned with their values. By surrounding themselves with a supportive community, individuals can gain valuable perspectives, receive encouragement, and ensure that their relationships are built on a strong and wise foundation.

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10. According to this lesson, how does effective communication impact the success of a relationship?

According to the lesson, effective communication impacts the success of a relationship by fostering clarity, understanding, and emotional connection between partners. It helps prevent misunderstandings, resolve conflicts in a healthy manner, and ensure that both individuals feel heard and valued. Open and honest communication allows couples to express expectations, share their feelings, and work through challenges together. By practicing effective communication, relationships can grow in trust, mutual respect, and long-term stability.


The list of lessons for Friendship, Dating, and Marriage by Eddie Eggerich.

  1. Romance
  2. Why And What Of Dating
  3. Who Of Dating
  4. When And Where Of Dating
  5. How Of Dating 1
  6. How Of Dating 2
  7. Can Be Forgiven For Past Wrongs
  8. Male & Female Differences 1
  9. Male & Female Differences 2 due by 4/27
  10. Male & Female Differences 3

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