Tag Archives: Relationships

The Beauty of Jealousy

I was listening to my daughter talk about a time in her early teens when she was extremely jealous over a boy she liked. That feeling became destructive and cost her two friends.

Jealousy is back, not in her own life but in her friend’s. She is dealing with it differently too. Her friend became jealous of her. Her answer to him in part was to state her own boundaries regarding jealousy. She said to him, “If I do such and such it makes you feel jealous. If you did such and such I would not feel jealous.”  Well, at least they are talking about it.

I asked her, “What is the purpose of jealousy? Why do we at times feel jealous? Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Why did God give us or allow us to have feelings of jealousy? Is jealousy something we want to keep in our relationships or something we want to keep out of our relationships?”

I then began to explain a point that came to my mind after the reading of chapter 1 of the Abolition of Man. Is a thing good because you ascribe value to it or is a thing good because in and of itself it is good?

The first part of this book is a discussion around two people’s perception of a waterfall. One says it is pretty and the other says it is sublime. A third person is bothered by this difference of opinion. All this led me to formulate my question regarding the true nature of goodness; is beauty in the eye of the beholder or does it exist on its own? A simpler way to think about this might be to state the question in an opposite fashion like this: Is a thing evil because I don’t like it or can a thing be evil in and of itself?

I proceeded to say to my daughter that if beauty or goodness or evil exists on its own than there is something outside of ourselves, something even outside of our relationships, something beyond us that we would do well to long for if it is good and despise if it were evil.  And isn’t it because of this good beyond ourselves that jealousy finds its proper place in our lives? Jealousy is a powerful feeling at times and can be mishandled, but the proper role of it is to empower us or to help us preserve the good, the very good we desire in another when we say we love them.

Those are my thoughts.  What are your thoughts regarding the questions I’ve asked?  I’d like to hear what they are.

Why Family?

The family is the basic cell of society in accord with the natural order of things. It gives stability to society and is the ideal climate for the formation of children. Moreover, the family was elevated by Our Lord Jesus Christ who instituted the Sacrament of Matrimony.

Why Tradition Family Property – TFP Student Action

Is Facebook destroying your life?

From Excessive social media use leads to depression
Saturday, December 08, 2012 by: Jonathan Benson, staff writer

Particularly with so-called “social” media, which includes popular websites such as Facebook and Twitter, the erosion of true friendships and their replacement with shallow and oftentimes meaningless online connections is having a devastating impact on society, as the human need for real connection is becoming increasingly harder to find. In the absence of genuine relationships and love, having multiple media sources active and engaged at all times is the only way that some people can cope, but it can also lead to mental illness.

“If you are predisposed to anxiety it seems that the pressures from technology act as a tipping point, making people feel more insecure and more overwhelmed,” said Nicky Lidbetter, CEO of Anxiety UK, in response to a similar study conducted earlier this year with regards to social media and how most social media users believe sites like Facebook and Twitter have made their lives worse.

Adding to this sentiment, Dr. Cecilie Schou Andreassen, author of the earlier study, noted that people who are anxious and socially insecure, typically use sites like Facebook more than others because they “find it easier to communicate via social media (rather) than face-to-face.””

Social media is actually ISOLATING teens

(Natural News)
Aside from negatively impacting the concentration of teenagers, “heavy smartphone use” is linked to “an increased rate of social isolation, depression, suicidal thoughts, and even suicide.”

A decade after Steve Jobs, Apple’s co-founder, launched the first iPhone, 92 percent of teenagers own a smartphone. A double-edged sword, smartphones revolutionized communication but they also increased “the risk of social isolation.”

Smartphones have also made it easier to cyberbully individuals. A lot of teenagers have been miserable because of cyberbullying, and it has even driven some teens to commit suicide. (Related: Excessive social media use leads to depression.)

From 2010 to 2015, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) determined that the rate of suicide and severe depression went up by more than 30 percent among teens aged 13 to 18. About 60 percent of the increase was among teenage girls.

Because the internet gives teens access to all sorts of social media apps, they aren’t talking to each other as much. They’re chatting, they send messages, and they like photos and videos but everyone is texting instead of talking in person.

Based on a recent study by Florida State Universitythere is a significant link between suicidal tendencies and smartphone usage. Researchers determined that those who were on their devices for over five hours daily had at least a “50 percent incidence of at least one suicidal behavior.” The study’s authors note that teenagers who owned smartphones and were on social media had a higher risk of reporting “mental health issues.”

Meanwhile, the researchers share that teens who spend less time on their devices and participate in physical activities or read books had a smaller chance of developing mental health problems.

In a separate report from Common Sense , it was revealed that the majority of younger children spend their formative years on their phones instead of with their parents. About 42 percent of children aged eight or younger own a tablet, marking a great spike from one percent back in 2011.

In France, phones are about to be completely banned in lower and middle schools. U.S. schools should be considering this move as well. Schools could also offer electronic devices that are restricted to “school-related or independent academic work” to discourage smartphone overuse.

Cyber etiquette

Another approach to consider is the introduction of cyber etiquette so adolescents can learn how to use their devices and the internet responsibly. It can teach children how to manage their time spent online, how to deal with cyberbullying, and how to integrate “empathetic face-to-face ‘human’ skills” to the online world. It can also emphasize the “importance of offline relationships.”

No matter how hard we try, we can’t totally eliminate smartphones from our lives. However, we can take the necessary measures to educate our children on how to use their devices wisely. Before we go and give them their own smartphones, we just need to make sure that they have a firm grasp of basic communication skills.

Teach teens to manage their cellphone usage

To curb potential smartphone overuse, teach your teenagers how to use their devices properly using the tips below:

  • Teenagers are stuck in the middle ground between childhood and adulthood so you need to carefully monitor their smartphone usage. As a parent or guardian, you must discuss cyber etiquette so they know the rules and the consequences of abusing this privilege.
  • Decide on their phone usage hours. Can they use their phones the whole day? Should it be turned off by their bedtime? Limiting their “phone time” gives your children time away from social media so they can enjoy other activities.
  • Always open the lines of communication with your children. They need to know that they can trust you with their problems, especially if they are being bullied or harassed online.
  • Ask about school rules for smartphones. Not all schools will allow students to have their phones with them during class hours. Review the rules so your kids know what they can and can’t do with their phones.

You can read more articles about how to use technology wisely at FutureScienceNews.com.

Sources include:

LifeZette.com

HuffingtonPost.com

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Is Sexual Freedom the Most Important Freedom?

The consequence of ideas…

  • On April 23, 2018, a van allegedly driven by Alek Minassian, drove onto a sidewalk in downtown Toronto, killing ten people and wounding eighteen others. Many, I admit myself included, had the initial thought that the motivation for this attack had something to do with ISIS or radical Islam. But the truth turned out different, and in some ways more disturbing. On his Facebook page, Minassian pledged allegiance, not to ISIS, but to the “Incel Rebellion.” “Incel” stands for “involuntarily celibate.” As Vox.com explains, the “rebellion” is “not an organized militant group but rather an ideal developed by . . . an online community of men united by their inability to convince women to have [intimate relations] with them.”
  • In 2014, Elliot Rodger, before killing six people in Santa Barbara, California, made an “explanatory video” whose principal complaint was that attractive women wouldn’t sleep with him.
  • Alleged Parkland shooter Nikolas Cruz is said to have written “Elliot Rodger will not be forgotten” in response to Rodger’s video.
  • That’s at least thirty-two deaths that can be linked at least in some way to young men’s frustration over “their inability to convince women to have [intimate relations] with them.”
  • the sexual revolution elevated intimate relations to a kind of sacrament and told people that sexual freedom is the most important freedom, it made no provisions for the fact that, in this new regime, there would be winners and losers.
  • ideas have consequences, and bad ideas have victims.

https://diigo.com/0c3088

Prov 23:7 For as he thinks within himself, so he is. He says to you, “Eat and drink!” But his heart is not with you.

Did not those who hatched the sexual revolution know this?

The privilege of bringing children into the world

The privilege of bringing children into the world carries with it the responsibility of teaching them the fundamentals of sound character.

By tftd On 23 March 2015 ·

One of life’s greatest joys is the sense of wonder that accompanies the arrival of a tiny new human being into the world. But that joy is accompanied by a tremendous responsibility that perfectly encapsulates the need for personal initiative. You can provide children with all the physical advantages of a good childhood, but unless you strive to set a good example for them to follow, you will know only dismay as they reach adulthood and blossom into purposeless drifters. Your personal initiative, whether or not you are raising a child, must always incorporate exemplary behavior. You cannot take ethical shortcuts, big or small, without other people observing them and assuming that this behavior is something you wouldn’t mind having turned back on yourself. Certainly you will make mistakes, but if you have always striven for the best course, others will remember it and treat you accordingly.

via The privilege of bringing children into the world carries with it the responsibility of teaching them the fundamentals of sound character. | Napoleon Hill Foundation.